The Simple Key

The Simple Key

By John Willette

I was sitting in my apartment and I heard a rustling at the door. It was the management leaving a letter quoting the amount for next year’s lease. I opened it up and of course they were raising the rent once again. The two years prior they raised the rent 22 percent each year. The one for next year was going to be another 15 percent. It was getting unmanageable. I sat in my chair at my home office and held my head down. I said to myself I can’t do this anymore. What am I going to do? I turned and looked up and on my wall was the answer. I had posted something I had heard on a coaching call in a class that I had taken. It said, “Can you make yourself do something you really don’t want to do to get what it is that you really want?” The presenter stated that this was the simple key to success and there really isn’t more to it. I remembered putting it up because it’s simplicity made perfect sense and it stuck with me. I decided at that moment that I was going to try to buy a condo or a house. I know what you’re saying right now, big deal John lots of people buy houses. This is true and I’ve had 3 houses myself. The difference now was because in 2006 I went through a divorce and was left with a house I could no longer afford. I went into a great amount of debt trying to keep it but I lost the house in spite of it. I believed this was my greatest failure. My credit score went in the dumps. Even two years ago I was turned down on a loan for a used car. I felt my failure was hovering over me and would follow me for the rest of my life. I knew that if I tried to buy a house all this would come back to haunt me. The words that were posted on my wall started to fit. I told myself this is going to be painful but no matter what I will follow through and see it to the end whatever that may be. I called a realtor friend of mine from Toastmasters. I told her I did not even know if I could get a house but I want to try anyways. She said let’s see what we can do. We looked for houses that fit my parameters and found one. Amazingly I was preapproved for a loan that would cover it. Apparently my credit scores had been slowly but steadily been going up over the years. She got me with her mortgage loan officer contact and then it began. This was the part I feared the most. I had to once again face my failures. I had judgments against me and negative credit marks. I had to settle the judgments and write letters explaining why I had them. I had to write why my house was foreclosed on and why I couldn’t pay certain debtors. These letters were the hardest thing I’ve ever had to write. I did however turn the letter into a positive one explaining what I have done since and how I’ve turned things around. That somewhat made me feel better. Now I had to wait on a decision. In the meantime I was paying for inspections, surveys, and deposits. I was putting my money on the line for something I was unsure would even pan out. After providing every piece of my financial life to them I finally got the word that I got the loan and I closed on the house. The reason I am exposing myself to you about this is that I want you to keep this question on your mind at all times: “Can you make yourself do something you really don’t want to do to get what it is that you really want?” It’s a simple question and it is the key to success. The greater the discomfort you can live with the more successful you will be. If the answer is “Yes” then you will achieve whatever you set out to do and that is my hope for you. 

A Tattooed Life

By John Willette

A few weeks ago I reluctantly took a friend to the emergency room. I say reluctantly not because I didn’t care about her ailment but because I absolutely loathe doctor’s offices and emergency rooms. To me they are a cesspool of negativity and sickness neither of which I want to participate in. When we arrived there were only three people ahead of us. Looking at the positive of it I thought to myself that would mean we would not be there very long. What happened next would make that fact irrelevant.

As we sat down a gentlemen sitting in the corner across from us asked why we were there. My friend, who was in pain, told the man about her ailment. He was in his late 50’s early 60’s, a bit overweight, and had a chair in front of him with both his legs propped up on it. As soon as she answered him I had a chill come over me. I instinctively knew this guy was the reason I don’t like emergency rooms. You know the person. The one that wants to tell you everything about their life and what is wrong. I said to myself, “Shields up John here it comes”. I was right! The floodgates were open and I was about to get washed away in a tsunami of negativity.

The gentleman proceeded to tell us about his legs which were in constant pain. Trying to avoid engaging in this conversation I just said I’m sorry for that and looked away. In hindsight this was rude of me but truly there is nothing I despise more than complaining. This did not deter him though. He continued to tell us that he had been out of work for three years because of it. He said he was homeless. He slept in tents and cars. He told us of his wife leaving him after a year of not making any money. “Big surprise” I thought to myself. He then said that if it were not for his mother giving him a couple of hundred bucks a week he would never survive. I gasped and thought to myself, “Now there is proof of a mother’s unconditional love”. After some more complaining about the hospital emergency room and staff, there was a ringing. He reached into his pocket and took a call on his brand new cell phone. Aside from being appalled about this I was relieved that I no longer had to be the target of his personal drama.

Soon after his phone call had ended an elderly couple came in and sat across from us. The gentleman in the corner asked them what they were there for. My blood went cold! I wanted to scream, “No don’t tell him!”, but there was nothing I could do. The husband told him that his wife had hurt her arm and needed it looked at. I sunk into my chair and as I feared the gentleman in the corner began to tell his whole story. I began to see the elderly man’s eyes glaze over. “Guess it’s not just me” I thought. Then the gentleman said something differently. He said, “Because of my legs I can’t work”. Because of that particular use of words for some reason it lit me up. “I’m in now……All in”, I said to myself. I sat up and leaned forward. I said to the man, “You could work if you wanted to”. He looked at me in total shock. He said, “What?” I repeated myself, “You could work if you wanted to”. I said, “You do realize that there are paraplegics in this world that have jobs and earn money.” I then said, “It is true that you have an affliction with your legs but you still have use of both of them.” “Sir you have chosen not to work”.

You could now hear a pin drop in that emergency room. I know I just said what everyone else was thinking but no one believed anyone would say it. I couldn’t believe I said it either but like I said for some reason I was all in. He leaned back in his chair and rolled up his right sleeve. He showed me a tattoo of an air wrench stretching down his arm hose and all. He said “See this, I’m a mechanic. I can’t work with bad legs.”

Wow! I just realized what the main issue is that this man is facing. It is something that many people fall victim to. He was associating what he does to who he is. We all need to understand that we are not what we do. We are not managers, doctors, lawyers, instructors, or mechanics. We are much more than that. What we do is simply use the skills that we have gained in our lifetime to earn a living. This man has taken it to a new level though. He isn’t tattooed for life. He has a tattooed life. He believes so much that being a mechanic is his identity that he had it tattooed on his arm leaving no other possibilities.

I said to him, “You need to retool. You need to find something else to do”. He opened out his arms with his palms up and said, “Do you have any suggestions? This is all I know.” It’s funny I think he was hoping now that I would stop but I continued. I asked him, “Can you read?” “Yes” he said. “Can you write?” “Yes” he said again. I said “Judging from your use of that new high tech cell phone I’m willing to bet you can use a computer and talk on a phone. True?” He shook his head yes. I said to him, “Sir with those skills alone you are better off than probably thirty percent of the world.” “I noticed there is nothing on your left arm.” He glanced at it. I said, “Sir you need a new tattoo.”

-End-

If you would like to be invited to a free group coaching workshop on how to achieve your goals faster  please email me with your full name and email address to: willettelj@gmail.com